朽木百哉のブォグ

Back to the mainstream tomorrow.

This afternoon will be an introduction to my colleagues will take effect tomorrow.

The previous night and the whole morning had been unusually showery, so hopefully, there aren't any areas across the island that'll be flooded. I had awoken several times but the final awakening was only around midday. Weather was cool enough for me to do without the fan.

Many things had surged through my mind during this 'mainstream hiatus' - considering the efforts placed to jumpstart my photography, that ship should be ready to set sail now.

Today's also a good time to navigate myself to commute via public transport as I do not see any feasible parking facilities nearby.
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It's another sleepless night and I had realised that I haven't wrote for quite a number of days.

This evening will be more activity-filled as I will be going to dearie's place for her mum's birthday celebration after an interview.

These few days had been exceptionally busy since I 'returned to base' over the weekend. I have been secluding myself much from people in the house as I wanted a full concentration while clearing those task I have on hand. 2 hours more to Ultimate Peace at home.

Hopefully, I can sleep soon since I had already done my workout.

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Just came across Lenz' photos of his company's incentive trip to Athens, a faraway place which many may not even have a chance to go.

At one glance, it does bring a mixture of different feelings. It feels good cos I know it's definitely a well-deserved trip, yet on the other hand, I would wish that I'm the person who gets to go.

You can say that things look pretty rough now since that 'hard landing' which left me to pick up the shards and move on ahead away from the crashsite. I had been left 'alone' in this landing and it's all up to myself to carve out a living for myself.

Again, it's the challenge of juggling between finding a mainstream while developing what I am good at to make it something that I can make a living out of...so that's how I am handling things now. I don't want to paint a very rosy picture by hiding all the 'flaws', but rather, just share about the overview of how things look here.

Lenz' good 'disciple' Kacy had left GE and went on to Walton International, which is already well-known for their landbanking programs which I feel, is utmost suspicious. Maybe this is a place that attracts people who go after the big dollar, just like how MLM firms carve that promising future into many youngster's minds that surges them forward.

Oh well, personal experiences and having seen many people during those days gave me a better edge of they function.

I hope tonight will not be a night where I have to sleep, with a truckload of worries up in my mind.
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This number called me again this morning when I had already told the caller yesterday that I'm not interested in their service.

Do they not talk to each other, or simply calling with their usual practice of "hawking down on updated CVS" like a hawk to its prey?

Another recruiter axed off.

The scenery appeared to be something identical to the game, ARGO online, an MMORPG which I had recently embarked on.

My Chaser character seemed to have come to life, and it was like dearie who had donned on the leather armour worn by the character, along with dual swords.

The world appeared so much more wonderful than the world I live in; endless green pastures for one to run on, the soft sunlight and of course, not forgetting those monsters trotting around aimlessly on different areas of the land.

It seemed like the sunshine in the morning had triggered the dream in this setting somehow. Back to the real world.

I've been a little baffled by the JD upon receiving as I was expecting it to be something from the first interview I had with Income. Just wondering how did my CV end up with a different LOB altogether, but still, it's worth exploring further.

I really wish that I'll be out of this "exile", or some may call it hiatus, so that things can get going again.

Many people around me are concerned, but with the approach, it also translates to a different effect depending on how their concern is presented. That's why sometimes I prefer to be alone so that I can keep my sanity "intact", while at the same time, casting my CV out and hoping to get a catch with a good offer.

At times, I've even thought if I should go back to my previous expertise, which would be something that I had been sick of doing, for the sake of sustainability?

Alright, back to the real world again. After the interview, it was lunch, then weights training, and then back to my solo world where I communicate solely with the cyberworld.

I have done a couple of interviews in less than a week - a good sign since the more I go / apply, the higher the chances of being offered. To keep this momentum going, it might be a good idea to set an objective of applying x no of jobs per day till I get back "in line".

The rest hadn't been very sound lately as every night, I would spend sometime pondering over when and how will be offered. On the surface, no one's stressing me but as time goes by, this unspoken amount of psychological pressure builds up. I might look all cool and calm outside, but within me, I would use the Great Red Spot on Jupiter to describe it - an everlasting storm that will never settle down.

The evening would be a BBQ gathering with some photography friends and along with dearie's company, so that should keep me occupied and my mind away from such disturbances.

We had a later than expected dinner at Seletar Gardens, which was about 15mins' drive from dearie's home. A good alternative as compared to going to the typical Chinese restaurant and having to squeeze with other families.

It took awhile more as the order of cooking was by tables, so our dinner officially started at 9:30pm. Good choice of dishes and the price was reasonable as compared to those restaurants, as we recalled the Mother's Day dinner at Dian Xiao Er was such a disappointment.

I had to get back earlier today as I will be having another interview tomorrow.

This number called me twice again today but I've rejected their calls. More and more people have been haggled by them:

http://adf.ly/1q45X

It's getting uncomfortable as the time goes by at home. This time, effects are amplified and it's better I take a break elsewhere for a longer duration.

The fact wasn't like such that I had minimal interest in securing a job, but things are a little different this time. I have yet once again sent out a couple of applications and it's the waiting game again, for the moment, but I really don't know how long it'll take this time.

Cool off time at a place where I can find peace.

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Today's not all for an outdoor shoot. Had awoken earlier in the morning with an 'all clear' sign from the headache that I had last night prior to slumber.

On my way to another quiet place - the airport, where I can put more concentration on doing my own things with the peace around me.

I could have stretched myself beyond my own capacity without realising; could it be that my 'limit sensor' had been overridden? That could be a little dangerous to a certain extent, but I said 'no' to Panadol as a pain suppressant.

Next, to hunt for a quiet spot later.

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There were times where I had thought of living off the grid, a vagabond lifestyle, especially so when moments spent at home are getting increasingly uncomfortable as the days of 'exile' increases as time passes.

I'm still fortunate as I counted my blessings one by one, as I have a wonderful partner whose heart and countenance is that of an angel, her caring family and mine, nice friends and the list just goes on and on.

Being omni-adaptable gives me the edge to live just off the standard gridded framework of power, water supply and also being weaned off from the comfort items of a typical city life.

So right now, here I am, seated on my foldable outdoor chair, or what many calls the 'director's chair' which comprises of a backrest, and a canvas-stretched seat on a foldable frame. Mine's a smaller version. Location's on a breakwater facing the sea with a few clusters of kelong scattered across the sea. If only I could have a taste of those lifestyle.

The beach is a place which I have not been to for awhile where one can find peace and tranquility, away from the hustle of city life.
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Staying out of home for an extended period of time has it's own pros - being able to be on full concentration while doing my job hunt, photoshoot or even for things that run through my mind.

I had spent the whole day out of home since I had done my workout. While there was room for boondocking, a change of plan was done as my angel had been worried for me "living out in the wilderness". It's nothing tough for me, but her concern is about the overall safety.

Anyway, this isn't the first time I'm venturing on the vagabond's lifestyle of boondocking. While many may think that this is rather unusual, it all boils down to being able to adopt to all kinds of lifestyle no matter how tough the going gets.

It's time to rest for now. Let's see how tomorrow's adventure will be.

Another Sunday.

I had slept pretty late last night as I had to spend some time running through my PTCs which I had not done for the day. Fortunately, most had been done before retiring for the night.

Dearie is still looking forward to sleeping for longer hours. For myself, the hours are just enough after 5 hours of slumber. Anything more than that will be capped at 8 hours max when I'm really tired.

Weather once again isn't that sunny today so it might not be a good idea to get out and play; maybe today will be another "stay at home" day. There are days where I like staying indoors, but when it comes to weekends, going out will more interesting than staying indoors, as I'm a person who loves the great outdoors, the sun, sea and trees.

I'm still thinking through about the encounter with Jesseca Liu at Marina Square yesterday; she certainly look gorgeous in person; and she does have this personality charm that just makes a person want to know her better - something warm which a few celebrities may be lacking.

I appeared in a place which looks like a desert, and there, I saw Huang Wenyong, he was posing for shots with a few people and then later on, he looked a little unwell, and walked a little slowly back to the rest area. That scene appeared to be a filming site.

Next scene showed myself talking to Apple Hong; we were like good friends and had so much to talk, laugh and joke about. It was a series of many scenes as one of them was showing me in the sea, trying to avoid big ships as I go about piloting my "patrol speedboat" while she was talking to me, and laughing at my sudden burst of humorous actions.

We proceeded to the rest area, within a block of old shophouses (once again, another filming site). I was telling her how cheerful she look as a person when doing hosting events and she thanked me for her compliment and told me a little more about her personality. It was like being able to catch up and work alongside with a good friend. All these while, there was a trusty backpack that I had been carrying.

Switchscene showed me leaving from a washroom near Bedok North Ave 4, after passing by those shophouses opposite my old home, and when I was about to cross the road, I spotted an own which was standing on the grass patch just across the canal. In my backpack was my camera, but I should have another backpack above that. I then realised that backpack was missing and went back to the washroom to locate it. Somehow, Apple appeared nearby and I asked if she has seen that backpack, so she went ahead to help me look for it nearby.

Upon entering the washroom, it had suddenly appeared to be a maze, and somewhat resembling the washroom in Everitt Building. It took me awhile to locate that bag, and upon locating it, I had suddenly awoken.

It's definitely not an adventure into the digital frontier. This dream seemed to tell me that I have a chance of being affiliated closely with celebrities.

Another rainy Saturday, so our plans for the morning trip to Punggol Beach is to be put off for today. Hopefully, the weather will be good tomorrow for me to catch something early in the morning.

Let's hope the weather doesn't get too wet and troublesome else our travel time might be delayed. A visit to Marina Square Centre Stage later where a flea market will be held.

The heat is up this evening; as I got ready to move out to meet my angel, the heat of the afternoon picks up even after a cold shower. Prior to this, I had already been heated up to the maximum, after putting up at the seat near the main door's house.

A rather quiet day as I spent sometime on PP of some older photos which have been left in my macbook for sometime. Also had some catch-ups with a friend whom I had not written to for 3 years. Time really flies, but I'm glad we got back in touch.

Hope we can grab a quick meal somewhere quiet before we hit home run.

Tomorrow will be a visit to a friend running a stall at one of the flea market spots.

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I saw myself in this marine war zone where there were 2 fleets; water was a little polluted by the "afterburner subs" which were doing some incendiary attacks on our forces. The shape of the enemy subs were somehow like they have this curved sides representing a Natalius, with a turning turbine. Turbine was turning hard and forcing flame into the water.

We have a crew of 4 people (they were familiar people but for a moment, can't match the names to their faces) whose sub was destroyed but they're scattered in the waters.

The subs were formed by a baton - something which was used in the Tron Legacy movie where it can transform to any vehicle, but this time, it's 4 people's combined effects from their individual batons.

I managed to located the crew in 2 parts and we finally moved out of the waters.

Switchscene showed myself, my brother and uncle who were at a cafe and we ordered some food. Casual conversation but my uncle was given another coffee which he actually ordered a more expensive, $4 selection from that range. My brother joined us and ordered Iced Milo, and a personal pan-sized pizza.

Next scene showed me moving through a passageway of time, like a photo story board, about how my birth came about. I have never seen that my parents kept photos of the progression before I was born, so this was like a third person's perspective and important moments were all captured on film.

Final scene showed myself in a colonial style miltary camp which resembled those buildings in Seletar, and with my previous boss, Encik Tan. We were talking about some things, but the unusual thing is that he has kept a moustache, and the suits we were in were not the regular military uniform.

Just watched another round on Tron Legacy while clearing those PTC. That show is simply visually captivating with those sci-fi CGI, and Olivia Wilde simply looks gorgeous. Little did I know she's actually the same age as my beloved angel.

The day had not been the least sunny, which is a good thing in one way, but definitely not on my side if I'm going for sunrise / sunset shoots. Nevertheless, I had my very early trip at 5:45am down to Lower Seletar Reservoir.

There's still no news from those interviews I've went, but I shant wait for their reply and the hunt continues. Hopefully, I can also find something to temp on while going back to my mainstream.

Another weekend is arriving. I've been quite used to this current hiatus I'm in, but it gets pretty dull at times when I can't keep myself gainfully occupied. Mum had given me some suggestions; worth keeping for consideration, but I too, have my own objectives in mind.

Let's hope I can find something good over the weekend.
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The weather didn't seem to be quite good for any outdoor shoots today, so I spent the day at home, working out and in the evening, a trip down to Bugis.

Life in the city is sure busy as usual. I have a inclination towards nature, so sometimes, I would wish that I can put up for a few days or so and being close to nature.

Well, nothing much catchy in the town area, so I headed home and looking forward to an early night's sleep before I move out early tomorrow.

Just made some awareness of calls from this number who is co-related with 68547111:

whocallsme.com/Phone-Number.aspx/68547711#p242817705893124726

I've been observing the pattern of calls by this number whih has been calling me since early May. They changed from 68547711, just hoping that I will answer the call.

I've also shared the call pattern here. For those who have been receiving calls from unrecognised numbers, this is a goos place to check:

whocallsme.com/Phone-Number.aspx/68547111/3

Weather is still rainy at this time no doubt there was already a huge downpour in the morning. Hopefully, dearie and I can go out later with a better weather over our heads.

Almost time for lunch. A fuelling up before we move out.

The familiar coffeeshop greeted me while I was queuing up for a meal; ordered some chicken served in a basket like the roasted pig skin which I ate at Bali. The stallowner was nice enough to help me carry the food to a nearby table.

I arrived at an LRT / MRT station where one u need to scan an access card before entering. Another person who was present with me was Guanxiong, Philip's son, but as there was only one access card, I decided not to go with him.

Later on, Guanxiong came around the "loophole" in the gate, attempting to pass me the card. Before he did, the staff who was stationed near the gate said he didn't see anything and allowed me to go through with the same card. I saw dearie later waiting along with others for the train. There was a place where there was a spray of water, and dearie was casted into this "water pose" whereby I was seemingly ready for a shoot of her being drenched in the water spray. Guanxiong, at that juncture, was very amazed at the whole scene.

Next scene, Rash Soccer. Every player had the right to wear illegal "gears", such as hardcore shin guards and the like. One opponent player was hurt after kicking our fellow player (our player resembling Tony Jaa), who revealed his shin guard: a spiked piece of material.

The game was like a soccer game without rules; everyone was free to do whatever they liked. A fight scene followed where he potrayed his martial arts expertise when tackling the soccer ball.

The evening had been spent pretty well with dearie; after dinner, we went for a walk at Marina Square and found a faster, yet quieter way from the Citylink.

There were many beautiful things that we saw and enjoyed the window browsing. Dearie bought a mini version of Pooh which somewhat looks like her favourite at home. I had some things that I would like to see, but for now, rather not since I will not be able to put that into consideration.

Dearie's sound asleep now, for myself, mind is still fully awake and can't enter slumber that easily. On some days, I could sleep deep at an earlier hour, probably because I had a day which were filled with energy-depleting activities.

Exercise Day later. Hope I can sleep soon after laying on bed tonight.

It's another Friday; 2 Fridays to be exact since I left my previous company.

Good thing is that dearie and I can go out over the weekends as her exams are over, so it's a good time to plan something for our weekend together.

The previous night had been a little mentally disturbing as I had been struggling with mum's concern about me getting reemployed. I have been hunting but so far, no leads yet. Hope today's hunt will bring some good news over the next week.

Considering that the school vacations had started, this might not be a good time for me to hit the pools, especially on a weekend where families will be there and swimming in a less populated pool may be quite impossible.

My current situation might be identical to Carol's ex boss, whom I had learnt about his plight, and not being able to find a job since then, for about 1/2 a year to be exact.

Maybe the best option for the weekend is to hit the papers for any openings that my experience may come into relevance.

I just have to continue to press on.

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For a moment I felt like there's nothing much I can do at this hour.

A friend will be away for concert till tomorrow, so I'll have one less person to keep in touch for the moment.

Have been searching through some resources online for good sites for shoots, but seem that the only thing I can do now are landscapes since there aren't any responses for my portraiture shoot requests. Guess I just have to push on...but sometimes, it's the mental fatigue that bogs me down.

The week is coming to an end; still no prospects of any offers from the interviews I've attended. I just have to keep fingers crossed, keep the faith and continue the hunt.

Dearie's work will be piling up since a colleague is leaving, so that will put a substantial strain on her time spent at work, while juggling also her studies...reinforcements have to reach her department soon, else it'll be disastrous for her workload.

Probably I just need a mental rest for the day as my physical strength remains undepleted at this stage of time.

Weather has been pretty fair these, except for the heat buildup in my room that I can feel every day hour. The season's getting warmer; even so next month as it's the thermal peak season in Singapore, resulting in me having to get some real cool air out of the house.

Let's hope the mental realignment of energy will be resetted back to nominal condition when I take an eyeshut later.

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