朽木百哉のブォグ

It was quite a sight when I opened my eyes in this world that seemed so real and isn't; I was on a hospital bed that looked far more exaggerating than a regular one-bedded ward kind of setup.

It wasn't those ICT type of rooms where most equipments can fit within a room and still relativitely spacious. It had 2 folds - one on each side, completed with sophiciated machines.

Seemed like a real "mutant enhancement" experiment like Wolverine being injected with Adamantine.

Prior to that, I had saw myself with a row of studs that lined my jawline all the way fro my sideburns. This looked too good tobr true as I had always been deficit in growing facial hair to the extent of what I desired.

Finally, I awoke and realised it's already 715am.
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Another day before the festive season PH. Seems like there had been quite a fair bit of PHs being compressed within this short period of time; so what comes after will be a PH drought that we will face before the next break.

Morning had swifted by and soon, pressure is starting to build up but I'm able to keep this off considering the fact that tomorrow is a break. So one day as a good breather.

Hope dearie had rested well last night. It was a sumptous meal as we all occupied 2 tables in a late dinner which ended around 940pm. No doubt I can't bear to leave dearie, the time in the late evening was to unpack my stuffs and do some settling in before starting the next battle week.

Lunch done quickly as usual; my restzone is more populated today considering tomorrow being a rest day for many. Many might just be on a long weekend ahead.

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Last night was an overdrive while I stayed so mentally awake even after fetching dearie from school. The journey on the road had been such a blast as I thundered through the highway.

While I'm not what many call the street-racer, driving is also a form of mental unwinding that keeps me relaxed, in the fast lane style.

That's also how true this society had been shaped; the fast, rich and smart (not always referring to brainy) makes their mark in their wealth and success.
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A real gesture of cooling to start the day off: a heavy torrential rain that almost hindered everyone's travelling time to work. Fortunately I had moved off from base at an earlier time.

Tomorrow's the big day where the eligibles will choose the country's next leader. Following along were many jokes made in the form of poems that flooded the cyberworld. All's good to be the 'national humor' of the season.

Well, the good news is that tomorrow's a public holiday in view of the election event, so those who don't get an off day on Sat will benefit from it.

Wishing myself a swift and smooth day ahead.
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I had dozed off the night before without turning the lights off. Though I woke up at 5am this morning, a return to slumber quickly was a sign of certain fatigue.

Could it be due to the pressure from mainstream, or just from the concentration done with PP?

It's been awhile since I had this kind of 'mental overdrive' no doubt there's a high level of tolerance. Anyhow, the recharge had been done.

The 'engine-braking' effect was felt again last night; might be a sign of internal pressure buildup. This time it didn't hinder me from entering slumber like the last few occurences.

Midweek again. Wonder what lies ahead for me?
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Another 1/2 hour to kill before returning back to the battle bunker.

Had a blazingly quick lunch and managed to find a seat despite the crowd during this lunch hour. Sometimes, one can be so envious about those who can walk around during the weekdays.

I have about a month more before going back to the 'green life' for awhile as it's time's up for the next phase of training. Well, just finish this quickly so I can be 'free' from such liabilities.

Hope dearie had a good rest last night as I'm starting to feel how I'm gonna miss her during that 'green life' phase.

This lunch hour is one good time for me to do some mental deposits before putting my mind to 'manning battlestation' later.

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The walk to dearie's home, it does bring about a sense of warmth to know that I have a loved one waiting for me at home.

Lugging my gears, with a few cups of Cup Walkers in a hand, I passed through the quiet neighbourhood in the evening while most people can only be seen in the shopping mall area in a town still developing.

Maybe I had been a vagabond for too long that such warmth aren't felt as often as a normal person would?

As I walked no doubt there was fatigue, with energy under good control, I could sustain till the late hours of the evening.
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Once again, on the journey to mainstream. Yesterday was one battling day as I had a tensionised mind when I got home.

Good thing I did the workout that unloaded these from the mind and oozed out those tension through perspiration. It was really a good workout.

At this moment, part of my mind is still on those exciting moments when I am armed with my camera. They made the Sunday afternoon interesting, but sadly, these moments didn't last.

So right now, back to the 'railway'.
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I usually don't have much time to blog during weekends, but since I'm going for a shoot, and while commuting there via public transport, I might as well take sometime to write.

Had a really filling dinner last night with dearie. What still remained in my mind was that red building in Katong that had been cordoned off with zinc panels, standing there in the dark of the night without any human activity. Wonder if it held any glorious past?

Since I'll be at the STCC for extended hours, it'll be some good time to catch up with Leonard who is the only available person in our group to join me.

I should be reaching around 1pm or so.
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It was like a scene down memory lane.

First, I saw myself in an old British barracks setting where there are family members as well as boss from mainstream, some remarks exchanged about faith views.

Next scene showed me trailing a rag-and-bone lady who was shabby and had pooly-maintained appearance. She was going around salvaging scrap metal and we saw this unit in the block of flats we were in, where it was only accessible by a single beam and was all metal-plated up; even the 'signboard' was a kind of shiny metal plate with some Chinese words printed on it like a 'residential temple'.

We decided to move on since there's no proper access to that unit. I later saw dearie and her family in a corridor-unit that resembled those older flats in Bedok North St 3 and I had popped by to ask if they had eaten. Her brother was eating a cake which looked delicious (but had reminded me of an inedible 'ice cream on Oddity).

I saw Gary Ow, an ex-ECA friend who is now a businessman; and his beginning to his current success was also humble. I shared this with a fellow BB friend while on the bus back: according to him, after leaving the forces, he work as a chef with SFI before getting into partnership along with 2 others. Now he is a boss of a food catering chain. While sharing about all these, we had all been commuting via a LRT like monorail where it was quiet and comfortable.

Final scene showed me taking a cab and I had told the cabbie to drive me back to this old camp - where it resembled Gullimard Camp.

7am, time to get back to the real world.
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The heavy-chested sensation seemed to have died off a little when I had left the mainstream 'room' for lunch. This morning, it had disturbed me a little.

While it had been a number of days since I last did some update of market research for my real works, this was a good time for me to catch up. It's better than not touching at all, as that will only add pressure to that disturbing heavy-chested sensation, which, according to Chloe, does not go off soon.

Just wondering what does that sign speak of; was it simply a sign of anxiety, or could it just be stress-triggered?

I'll be returning in awhile, but that sensation does somehow bring a kind of excitement into my life; afterall I am a person who likes to live riding the waves. So may this be a sign for me to 'get up and start the ride'!
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There was a vision of me climbing down the stairs like what I did in the building of the mainstream, where scenes of manual workers napping along staircase landings could be seen.

I reached a particular flight of stairs and saw this person laying in an awkward manner. From his position and attire, it was obvious he had been grossly drunk as his phone was at the flight of stairs above him.

3:30am. I must have dozed off last night.
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I had awoken to the continuous light in my room while having a dozeoff of about 3.5 hours after doing some PP for an event.

The day at mainstream had been on a different battle note. Fortunately the day had been over quick and I could concentrate on what I do with an undying passion.

No doubt I had resumed slumber after tossing and turning on bed for an hour or so, the mind had already started its neural activity on an accelerated basis.

I have to have and action some plans to get myself off this 'mainstream track'.
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Manning and toggling battlestation was how the day went before going for a dinner with dearie and her family.

I had moved to a new workstation where I do not have my own space. Some place where it's somewhat in the middle of all with lesser space.

System hardware had been upgraded so it's taking awhile for many who had been here long, to get used to the new interfaces.

Fortunately, there's valid grounds for me to leave earlier before getting the next 'shot' right from the top. There had been ongoing 'infernal affairs' but I guess such conflicts are inevitable wherever a person works. The best option is not being involved.
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We saw a patch of land that looked like restricted grounds ahead; I had 2 people accompanying me. Of which, one of them is Zack Arias.

Lugging my camera on tripod and along with the 2, we ran across the land and saw an installation that was guarded by patrolling and armed guards. Zack took the 'dive' and ran towards the installation which, without the guards' notice (their guns changed to bows and arrows at this time), close enough to the main entrance.

When we were 'spotted' later, the guard head told us: "Welcome to KHF. You have to surrender all weaponary and if caught inside the premises with an unsurrendered weapon, you shall be sentenced to explain a valid reason...at the muzzle of the firing squad.". As he ended the sentence, he held the muzzle of the AK-47 slung around one of the guards to gesture it.

Weapon surrendering. That was when we realised we have a belt of weapons worn. One of the 'weapons' carried by my companion was also classified as one, as the main shaft of it is detachable from the handle.

We moved through the barracks and by a row of toilet cubicles, we found a few of them sitting in their cubicles, either looking asleep or simply unconscious. Hygiene level wasn't good. On the other side was the beds in neat rows.

Our mission here was to look for an object hidden in the premises; and we got a sign that it was hidden beneath bedsheets in a bed that was placed in the centre at the far end of the bunk.

7am. I had missed the morning's workout.
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One of the evenings when I stayed back later and managed to evade dining with mainstream owner.

Tonight's a Journey to the West - fetching dearie from her school before she fetches her parents later from the airport. It might just be a longer Night Battle on the road.

Hunger is what I've already been feeling for the past 1/2 hour since I had been dragged into a whirlpool of work before I "escaped"; the "den". Better get home fast to refreshen and recharge for tonight's battle.

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Home run. I've done the best of what I can so I have to leave the rest to be continued tomorrow.

This is my chance to catch my workout before dinner as I had missed it in exchange for that dreamland experience in Wild West. After that, then, will I have some decent time to finish up the rest of my work on another hat.

A heavier breathing; is it a sign that I have charged enough for the day to my max? Or simply because I'm hungry, tired or simply focused on accomplishing my next important task for the evening?

Hope dearie is not held up in office at this hour.
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I had been thinking about how to keep dearie entertained when she comes to my place. 1st thing was that my desktop had broken down; and being the only source of 'digital entertainment', she'll not have anything to do since I don't have a TV in my room.

Getting one might solve this problem in one way, but again, being a non-TV serial watcher, it'll once again be another problem for myself on the under-utilisation basis. So up comes to my mind about a console, but think again, how much time do I spend at home each day to be able to play those RPG like Fatal Frame, Silent Hill and related paranormal thriller titles?

A tablet will be a mobile solution, so it might just not give that 'ultimate entertainment', especially it fulfills a single-user's satisfaction only.
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Lunch hour.

Learnt that schools are also given an off day today; is there some kind of perks with the recent National Day.

Oh well, that explained why there are so many school children roaming around in malls today and dressed easy. The bus this morning was atrociously delayed; what had went wrong? Not a demoralising sight but still something worth thinking over the lunch hour.

Aside that, the sneezing spell somewhat had been subdued, but still good to keep tabs on the slightest condition of the nose irritation level that might improve / deteriorate.

Hope this day goes on smoothly to closure so I may have some decent time for myself.
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Another SMS scam of winnings:

"You won £500.000 pounds,MICRO SOFT FREE LOTTO PROMOTION 2010/2011.For claims send us Email name,mobile no,& country, address to: verifyclaims@claimsdept.co.cc"
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I saw myself in this place which resembled those dining halls, or rather, the kind of Victorian building where a function was held; saw some familiar faces like those from DA like Jessie, Ivan, Charles, and some military people. The ongoing event was somewhat like a high tea.

After walking out, there was a pool onboard the vessel where I saw Darell, and the water was very chilly; he was in the water with a comrade, as they were doing some maintenance out in the cold temperature; surrounding the ship was some iceland where massive mountains of ice surrounded the chilly waters.

Next scene showed a village-like surroundings where I saw Martin, a common friend whom I had seen at a few outings with ex colleagues, jumping into the water (which was supposed to be freezing cold), but yet, the surroundings appeared to be like those tropical countries like Thailand or Cambodia. Everyone was swimming, treading water in some kind of fellowship in that wood-building architectured "water village".

It switched to some "regimental" settings when it was mealtime; everyone was supposed to queue up to get our share of food; prior to this, it was "free for all" and everyone could take their food in their own ways till Chan Min (my ex BB officer) came and controlled things. He said "take your share properly, cos that's going to be what you will only be entitled to".

Oh well, some reenactment of those old days in BB camps.

Next, I opened up a map and look at where Red Sea was; someone who resembled May told me that if only they can go to there and "swim" from Red Sea to Dakota...strangely this map is all blue and the places didn't seem to be in the right geographical order.

I woke up. 8:15am...what a dream.

It's already in my 3rd hour since my awakening. An quiet scene in the bus as most people are already on a long holiday over the weekend. For me here in the mainstream, I can forget about any long leave as the very limited staffing will result in a big percentile of downtime when there is one less person in office.

Oh well, tomorrow's a public holiday so it's something to look forward to.

While I had been up at those early hours, it's one of those good quiet hours where your mind can do a thorough thinkthrough of whatever short / long term action one is in.

Seeing joggers on the street, the rather quiet street this morning does bring about a feeling of the holiday mood in action. It's something which many look forward to; covering the solo working day before a public holiday to go for an overseas vacation. I definitely need one some day. Afterall, we're born into this beautiful world and if we don't travel out of our homeland, I feel that one would have lived in vain on this aspect.

Mindbrake for now.
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I saw a familiar scene of driving towards Pu-Yi's place, which is just 5mins drive away from dearie's home.

There was a minor scene of a reenactment of familiar faces, when I saw dearie's colleagues at a departmental gathering. Her superior, Jolene, had bought some breakfast, amongst which, Jwee Kueh was my favourite but later on I had learnt that it was being ate up by Nicholas. Oh my...there goes my favourite...

A few scenes of eating KFC and related fried stuff for 3 meals within a day caused the disturbance and woke me up well before the alarm clock sounded. A 6-hour sleep.

The weekend had been spent wonderfully with dearie as we went to NEX for a meal, some walking, but the sneezing spell had been troubling me. Had taken some Panadol flu Max but the effects had not maxed out to disspell those sneezing reoccurence.

I hope it's just an aerial allergy and will go off after sometime. After a short nap at her comfy room, it was soon time for me to go back as today is a day in mainstream doing "covering fire".

As I lay on bed, soon, Sandman had showered his sleeping sand on me.

Good morning world.

This is yet another Saturday where I had been up early; no doubt I had prepared for slumber even at the early hours last evening, actual slumber commenced at a delayed timing.

I had been trying to get Infinity Blade into my phone after that exciting experience with Samurai Vengeance II, which, apparently, screen on my phone had been too tiny for comfort, is causing my eyes to be more tired than usual.

Oh well, short term entertainment.

It was an attempt to try sitting still to try to get into the 'slumber atmosphere' like how dearie usually does - her style is to snuggle under the comforter and in no time, she'll already been in slumberland.

A little mentally challenged due to mainstream intense and preoccupance of mind on what I really am looking forward to.

I was intending to set off earlier to hang around the early hours, but there had been some considerations of what goes into my bag. Thus, the setoff timing was identical to my usual.

After 1pm today, it marks the completion of Week 5.
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Another morning and approaching the 46th National Day which I could not see any patriotic mood in the atmosphere.

I came across an article online that the editor talked about how saddened he was when he did not see many Singaporeans fly the country flag. Following comments are somewhat sacarstic about the recent measures of increased cost of living against the winner in the recent General Election.

As crude as it may sound, but that's how many perceive as to why there is nothing to celebrate about this independence.

Yesterday was another earlier night as I had done quite a fair bit of work at night after that mindblowing workout. Slumber came on quickly before the clock even reached 1145pm.
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It wasn't some of those recent warzone, oldtown scenes that I had seen this time, but the atmosphere was a little blurry and dreamy like that of 9D.

Waterfalls, mountains and lush greeneries greeted me when I landed in a pugilistic world which could only be read about in novels or watched on TV.

Lightfoots and mass leaping were the normal way of travelling over great distances.

I saw myself in this brown rugged attire with leather greaves, woven boots and completed with bracers. Those were used only by unarmed martial artists as these were worn over the greaves.

Next to me was my companion, Fen, who was in a flowing pastel-colored dress, exquisite hairdo and a sword that reminded me of a swordplay that can only be executed successfully when the hearts are linked together.

The next series were scenes of actions of moving through woods, valleys and wastelands with weapons fully unsheathed.

Disturbance by the clock. It was already 7am.

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I managed to split the full version of workout into 2 sessions today; had just resumed the full version after a couple months of "tuned down" version in view of the high mental energy consumption prior to DX.

The usual goes; little refuelling done after that massive, sweatout workout; something which I have not got a chance to enjoy after so many months, especially after a mind battling session at mainstream. Reduction of carbo intake is the key to maintaining of a good physique.

Mind's a little more relaxed but shall remain in my own world now to finish what is needed to be done for the evening, daily.

The setting appeared in an old shophouse not of the local settings, where there were a handful of townsfolk. It was like a rest place for the group of people I was with; a little like I'm on site for some media production. 1st sign of the female singer, appearing to be a budding talent.

Switchscene and I saw a lady whom reminded me of Fish Leong / Lorraine Tan, 2 singers whom have a close resemblance of the aura they carry. Apparently, I saw this singer earlier at Lot 1, where there was some kind of publicity event. She just had her haircut which I spotted earlier at the old town. But this time is when she's fully attired.

Another scene showed me entering some 'bunker' where a small group of peace-keeping troops were at, all resting, along with their commander. They appeared to be ready to move out after their 2-week tour of duty at this area. A reminder of my days during a peace-keeping mission during my actual tour of duty.

Final scene of seeing myself at a mountain ranch, with dimmed skies and a beautiful array of floating, scarf-like, complete with a silky touch in the skies...Northern Lights!

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There has been a few things on my mind after completing the first month at mainstream. Not only have I survived the long hours, the other thing is that I've got those who nagged at me to be silent.

Everyone has a tolerance level of how much they can when being ranted on. For myself, it has brimmed and tipped. A fortress has been erected around since then.

I thought this would be the best solution for situations like this. No struggle and verbal wall.

Just plain silence.
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I've hit the slumberland button at 1230am after the full blown version of workout and doing some reading on qualities required for another hat.

I was back home earlier than usual, as I could not be held back waiting till the cows come home.

For a moment, I had thought that the slower-paced things were contrary to my personality, but for the sake of gaining the needful experience, it is best to stay on for awhile more before considering the move-on.

Total rest time was about 7 hours, so it was a fair bit of decent rest.

Hope dearie had a good rest too despite having to work late hours.
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The scenes of the dreamland had not been very clear as my mind has started to disengage from the trails of occurences, just like how vapor trails in skies dissolve into the surroundings till no trail could be seen.

It was definitely something of the kind of world I look forward to be in; some of extremity and harsh, while some are just breathtaking.

The cause of these scenes running through my mind could also be due to an unsettled mind which I entered dreamland with. In time to come, these dreamland occurences could be extracted into literature.
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The first day after the 1st month@mainstream had been done.

Many thoughts came to my mind after meeting up with dearie's secondary school friends yesterday afternoon. I made some humorous gestures towards the end of our meetup and the whole group broke into laughter...I guess that part of me can't remain under cover. Or maybe I lack an exposure to peers of our age category?

A month more and I'll be hitting the next milestone in my life journey; that's the time to check on my self-achievement.
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