朽木百哉のブォグ

A long slumber commenced since 8pm as I had been bushed from the days’ events; prior to the day before, I had slept only 2 hours in total, as I had a late night workout, hoping to make myself tired enough to enter slumber, but after laying on bed for several hours, I can still feel that there wasn’t any entry to slumber; no dreams, no sleepy feeling, nothing.

All these dragged on till I heard my dad’s alarm clock chiming at 5AM where I then started to feel sleepy.

I had attended an interview before this at a workplace which is much nearer; opening was informed by Chloe who has been working there for quite sometime. Soon in the afternoon, I was contacted by the HR department that they have decided to hire me, and went down to sign the agreement.

The weather had been really erratic lately with periodical passing thunderstorms which made the journey challenging, and took me awhile to find the place. Well, that could all be the contributing factor to my fatigue which encumbered me soon after a quick gobble at the afternoon-cooked rice as I had started feeling hungry even at 5PM when I was on my way back from the HQ in River Valley; a long drive home with the congested traffic.

Weiming was very kind to ask if I like technical positions as he wanted to ask if I am interested to join his company as a Technical Executive. I had already got a job, so will be staying there for sometime and since working hours are regular, it’ll be easier for me to take up evening classes which will enrich my knowledge and increase my worth with additional qualifications in time to come.

My auntie is overjoyed to know that I have secured a job as I had been troubled with this issue about getting what I want for the past 1 month or so, but had not been very successful in getting the position I have applied for.

Back to what I really want; I seek glamour and recognition, just like those celebrities on red carpets and being in the limelight and getting tons of attention from media organizations…such is the kind of lifestyle I want…so now I have to boil down to know what kind of profession will lead to such a lifestyle.

21 years just passed so quickly, which I was reminded of visiting my grandmother in SGH 21 years ago, and the height adjustment of the patient’s bed was controlled by the turning of various knobs for various elevations.

This time, it has been replaced with electronic control that my third uncle, who had been admitted to due to his fall down and the swell in his left hip joint. He is already 69 years old this year; 10 years senior to my dad. My grandmother was his mum and he has lost much way, bringing the resemblance of his mum so much closer. I remember that he used to have quite a big paunch and was pretty fleshy back then when he was healthier.

There was a little dipping of my emotions when I was reminded of my grandmother whom I still miss very much to this date, who has left the world 21 years ago from cancer. No doubt my third uncle’s not feeling very well, he still managed a very warm and friendly smile which brings about a prickle in my heart that will somehow wet my eyes, because every inch of that smile he carries tells me how much he cares for me and reminded me of every bit of my grandmother who took care of me during my toddler days, and every sight that he winched in pain while trying to move to a more comfortable position brought pain to my heart too.

My cousin sister dropped by to see him from work as she is working in Tanjong Pagar, and managed to get her mobile number after so many years. The last time I visited them was for a business visit as I wanted them to benefit from the Healthmag that I was using, but then it’s the past and no longer matters.

Pray that God will keep him in best comfort and let him be well after his operation which will be tomorrow.

It has been awhile since I wrote my thoughts, as much has been occurring in the past.

For a moment back then, it felt like my career was going for a jump start when I was offered a position with a wine company in the UK, which was offered a couple of days after I submitted my application. Many things had to be prepared such as gathering more information, preparing myself mentally to suit the lifestyle and working environment that I will be in, which it all turned out to be a scam which gave me a great discomfort when they asked me to borne 20% of the fees for worker’s permit, which should be borne by the hiring company in all cases. Their practice turned out to be in accordance to the advance fee fraud which I read on a website that was provided by my aunt from her research that made me decide to drop it.

My relationship with Yuzhen became stronger and closer over the time as we spent chatting on the phone and meeting up a few times over these few weeks. She indeed was really quiet and kept very much to herself, but after knowing her through this period of time, I realized that she has somewhat the same personality as me, in the sense of keeping things to herself and not telling others about her unhappiness. Towards the end of our meetup yesterday, she revealed to me that she has this feeling of self-pity which could not be explained, and whenever such is mentioned, she will withdraw into a still quietness that leaves me thinking how I can cheer her up or break the silence with a change of conversation topic. She somehow look different when we met up yesterday, later in the night for supper, as her black top complimented her skin tone really well.

Challenges ahead in life seems to be getting tough, but I do not want to dwell on the unhappy things in life and move on, getting stronger and wiser with life’s experiences that I may share with my offsprings in future. I want people around me to be proud of me, especially my parents, thus for now, biting my lip and moving on to greater levels would be the best thing I can do.

This process would not be easy, and require me to seal up my emotions where necessary so as to be able to focus my energy on the more important things towards my goal.

My diary shall resume on a daily basis that talks about the happenings of life that shall be etched into eternity in this cyberworld of my paper-less journal.

It has been a great time of riding since the last visit in Jul 2006 to Citylink, the town riding spot for Singapore flatlanders.

I managed to get to know Taka, Calvin, Anton, Chris, and got to talk more to Will; not forgetting Jiawei whom I have met in 2006 when I came back to the riding scene.

The place is really conducive to ride; cooler temperature and smoother surface which does not exhaust us from extended period of riding.

Currently learning the doubled version of Fire Hydrant which I was able to pull of the preliminary single variation with not much of a problem, as well as my cyclone which has become smoother than ever. The environment makes it all so fun to ride as we can ride and stop periodically to chat up and get to know each other.

Not forgetting Sharky who came from Hong Kong and Peter brought him there as I was unable to reach earlier to bring him there due to my leaking tube on my way there. I'm sure he enjoyed himself; good thing there was Will who spoke fluent Cantonese and could converse with him, as I had difficulty with my very limited Cantonese.

Flatlanding should be continuing when I am in the UK to work since I'll save on shipping if I get a complete bike from OG...still considering if I should change parts on my current bike, and which frame, fork, stem and other parts to replace...

Keep riding is the key!